A day before the end of 2014. Nothing much left at the office during this moment, people come and go. So many things on my desk but yet to know where should I start, those left is like me stayed because we have ran out of annual leave for the year. By then I have to come to work until I get my new leave entitlement for 2015. Pooooooor me! but that's fine. I have to fully responsible on what I have done earlier. Stay awake please dearie eyes!
Times flies over everybody but leaves its shadow behind. Look at the time, It's farewell to 2015. It is less then 48 hours before New Year. So many things happened unexpected and unplanned at one time and never to be recalled. I feel much-much better then before, the way I am, people surrounding, financial and social life. I am happy with the way things are that I managed by myself and the only me the only one standing in my way.
Hurmmm..these few days I've found myself too weak, I am sick for no reason after a week came back from my vacation. Started with the eyes sore and coughing, the cough dragging me for almost a week. Things are getting worst especially at night when I was in the deep sleep. I'd went to see a doctor for 3 times, and I would say I managed to finished all the cough syrup that doctor gave to me earlier. I feel my nerves getting stretch each time coughing, truly horrible and dying. Asking myself, if this may cause of smoking? but I doubt. I still refused to admit and to stop smoking even I know smoking may kill me quietly. Recall the day that I started to smoke, hrmmm since last 20 years ago I guess. Reason being, life stressed and probably moving into an adulthood lifestyle. It's a strong addiction and now became an habit that is very difficult to break. The only bad excitement of experimenting with something that forbidden + I never had an experience with anybody to be around like who really care to stop me to do whatever I wanted to do.
I may not have a specific reason to excused and stick as a smoker but life stress and pressure may cause of anything happened. Well, just my silly excused! :p By the way I am still a smoker until today because that's the only thing that I could do to make myself more relaxed while going through a hard time in my daily life and knowing that I am wasting my money too buying cigarettes :'( but it's still fine for me rather I become a drugs or alcoholic addicts right!
What else will stay..
So many things come and go within the year, happiness and sadness. Just being a part of the color in my life. Experience is the best teacher ever! Much of things I know and understand has been learned through experience. Whether it was time spent of doing things or having experience out in the world, much of what I have learn is accomplished through doing and interacting with others. Bottom ups, I can't help getting older but I don't have to get old! Hahaha things that will stay for sure! Run baby run faster! Haha
Well, I don't have a sweet doovy lovey story of the year to tell neither a cute fairy tale dreams to share. My pray will always be the same everyday every year, for a better luck tomorrow and day ahead. Wishing a better life living forward and stay smile :-)
to be continue..
